I know what you’re thinking: how can I ever visualize without having memories of things that I’ve done before? Didn’t you say in your last blog that memories are where I keep all of my emotions? It’s true that our memories have emotions attached to them. It’s also true that the stronger the memory is (we make a memory stronger by playing it over and over again in our minds) the greater the emotional output for us when we’re looking for those feelings that we want like confidence, joy, connectedness, and love. But I promise you this…we have greater power with our imagination.
Before we jump in, let me remind you why this visualization thing is so valuable to you. We can always try to get our emotions from external sources: movies, visits with friends, running, whatever. But, first of all, those may not always be available, and secondly, they may not always give you the feelings you want. All emotion is created within you. Do you always feel energized and confident after your run? Does every interaction with your friend leave you feeling connected? Of course not! We have difficult runs, fights with friends, even a movie that promises to be inspiring can let us down.
We learned that all emotions are created inside of us. Therefore, the one fool-proof way we can get the emotions we want is to create them for ourselves, which, in turn, can help us go after what we want in life. Visualization is a time-tested tool that can help us achieve that!
Last week I talked about how we amplify our memory by using visualization to recreate within us those feelings we want. This week we’re actually going to talk about how we create a visualization and the incumbent feelings using only our imagination. Stay with me, this is going to get good.
The first thing we have to realize is that when we’re creating a visualization from scratch we need to let go of reason. We are completely using our imagination. We might supplement that with images from books, movies, people we’ve met, experiences we’ve had, anything we even think we might have seen one time is likely to creep into our minds. All of these are incredible fodder for making a visualization. But again, like we talked about last week, the most important thing is to not have judgment about what comes up for us.
When we’re doing freeform visualization anything goes. If the movie gladiator comes into your mind and suddenly you’re a character in the scene, now you imagine yourself in a gladiator outfit. Good for you! Keep going… Or maybe you hear in your mind a passage from a book you found inspiring. Perhaps you hear in your mind’s ear the soundtrack of a song that maybe you don’t know all the words but you remember the feeling it gave you… In any of these instances, you’ll build a visualization to elicit even more of that confidence that you were looking for.
OK so here’s how you do it:
First: like last week, identify the emotions that you want to feel. Without this step it’s like throwing darts at the side of a barn. You’ll definitely hit something, but your accuracy doesn’t have to be very good. Really focus down on the emotion that you want and think about how it feels in your body.
Second: allow that emotion to come into your mind and your body without judgment. So, the tricky part is now you’re going to start having things come into your mind that might have nothing to do with the task at hand. If you’re going out for a run and all the sudden you’re thinking about that gladiator movie we talked about, you might think to yourself what the hell does it have to do with my run? It doesn’t matter, no judgment. If it’s giving you the feeling that you want and stick with it.
Third: focus on the emotion, not the imagery or what your mind’s playing back to you. We are not using our reason or logic. It doesn’t matter if the image in your mind makes sense, as long as it gives you the emotion that you want. You could be visualizing yourself having wings, or the voice of God in your mind, and you’ll be inclined to think about the impossibility of it all. Believe me I understand. Your focus has to be on the emotion. If you let logic in, you’ll lose that focus. But, if you keep your focus on the emotion you are looking for and allow things to come up in your mind that will give you that emotion, then reason is irrelevent. Allow your imagination to do its job. As a wide variety of images and sounds play in your mind, the only thing you’re checking is that they keep reinforcing the emotion for you.
When you start doing this realize that a lot of this will feel foreign. I can’t stress enough about withholding judgment. Try and practice this visualization for five or ten minutes before you go into that business meeting, get yourself out on that run, or deal with a family member. Whatever it is that your mental-emotional challenge is, visualization can help you before, during, and after any action you need to take to help you get into the best frame of mind. It’s going to come in like a weak radio signal at first, if you’ve never done this before. But I guarantee you, as you continue to practice, you’re gonna’ have a wide variety of radio channels you can dial-into to help you create the emotions that you want for yourself.
If you would like help lessening your fear and anxiety, reaching your goals, breaking habits, or creating new ones, I’d love to work with you. Just click the button or the link below for a free consultation and let’s talk.
